It is probably better that the return of Third Lanark to the senior ranks is nipped in the bud now. Many of those who criticised Gretna for not having the ground or the fan base for the Second Division never mind the SPL suddenly went all starry eyed at the mere mention that Third Lanark could ''rise from the ashes.'' Without even thinking about what Third Lanark are NOW that all too familiar Scottish sentimentality looked forward to the return of the Hi Hi's on TV winding their way up the divisions without the tainted love of Brooks Mileson's millions. Aye, Third Lanark would be reborn and we'd all sleep better in our beds at night with 40,000 watching them every week, their results being shouted out for all to hear by the same news boys on the street corners that declared Victory in Europe and Scotland's 5-1 win at Wembley.

Third Lanark, for a few days at least, became the purists answer to Gretna but hold the bakelite phone because Third Lanark back in the Scottish League is about as likely as Scotland in a World Cup final!

Those who keep the name Third Lanark alive as an amateur club must be applauded but after only around five years of existence the 21st Century Hi Hi's must earn their place in the SFL and not trade on the past glories of the name alone. Spartans (born 1951) have earned their place in the SFL and the smart money remains on the East of Scotland League side. Spartans new ground continues to rise at Ainslie Park and even nearest challengers for League status Cove Rangers know that only a similar development in Aberdeen could see them overtake Spartans in the race for Gretna's place in the SFL.

Cove Rangers are definitely one for the future but Spartans will surely get the nod now. Preston Athletic, Annan Athletic and Gala Fairydean from the East and Huntly, Inverurie Locos and Buckie from the north would make ideal candidates, along with some other sides from the HFL and EOSL, for a Scottish Conference made up of respected non-leaguers, maybe numbering 10 in total, at the top of a much talked about Pyramid system but only Cove are even close to Spartans bid so forget about Third Lanark, Edinburgh City and other former names from the Scottish League's history and ambitious Juniors get ready to Meet The Spartans.

If we're talking about the fairytale of Third Lanark back in the SFL and providing us all with a happy ever after maybe these teams could also be considered ?

1. Princes Park FC

They play in a Scotland that resembles somewhere between The Broons and the movie Whisky Galore where everyone north of Glasgow wears a kilt and somehow even Second Division teams teams can pull in crowds last seen in reality at Hampden when Real Madrid played Eintracht Frankfurt in the European Cup Final. Most famous signing Hot Shot Hamish who left his remote island to barge his way through the comic book heaven of 40 yard drives that carry goalkeeper and last defender through the net and into a crowd of tartan tammy wearing supporters shouting ''Och, it's the HOT SHOT!!''

2. Melchester Rovers

Would Roy Race consider leaving the Premiership for a crack at the SPL with his team of honest professionals? No doubt the challenge of facing craggy Scottish defenders from teams with names like Dunmore Thistle and Glasburgh United would be too much to resist. Maybe even Third Lanark could appear in an episode as Scottish League Champions?

3. Adair's Anglians

Appeared in JET comic in the early 1970's. A remote Island called Anglia in the North Atlantic, based on the Falklands, is discovered to have a population still living in the Britain of Edwardian Times but the island team, still turning out in knee length shorts and practicing with laced up footballs, apply to FIFA, are recognised as an International side, and win the World Cup beating Brazil in the final coached by faded England hero Charlie / Nobby / Bobby Adair.

4. Kilnockie FC

Coached by Robert Duvall and featuring Ally McCoist as a washed up ex-Celtic forward. This team from the 1999 movie A Shot At Glory could have been the template for Gretna FC. They even had a millionaire benefactor in the shape of US tycoon character played by Micheal Keaton ten years after he played Batman.

5. Earls Park

The fictional team that is the base for the series FOOTBALLERS WIVES might bring some much needed glamour to our lower divisions. Joan Collins and Zoe Lucker at Firs Park or Cliftonhill? That would surely be worth the admission money alone!